random thoughts

Thursday, July 31, 2008

This is an okapi. It has a 14 foot long tongue.







I just thought you should know.
This is what I'd like for my next birthday.
Each time people begin a new chapter of their lives, they think about what they would like to accomplish and maybe even make a list of these goals.
For the new chapter of my life in New York, I would like to
- Cultivate (is that the right word?) a British accent
- Not be afraid of homeless people
- Befriend someone just for their dog, preferably a mini-husky
- Organize some sort of musical gang fight in Brooklyn

Wednesday, July 30, 2008

Relationships make you think about the sacrifices you'd make to be with someone else. And thinking about it makes me realize that maybe I would start eating meat again (after 13 years being a vegetarian) to be married to Jon Stewart.
Or the fictional character John Dorian.
Or Jim Halpert or the even the actor who plays him.
Or also any of the characters (male or female) from the first season of Grey's Anatomy.
Especially Sandra Oh.
After a break up is the one time you feel the urge to call someone you care about to make sure they are feeling miserable.
I think I will never have regrets about my decisions regarding the edible item Spam.
It's a lot easier to listen to co-workers' pointless stories when you get paid by the hour.

Tuesday, July 29, 2008

Do they make a cessation patch for Freecell?
I think the opposite demographic of the NBA must be nutrition school.
I'm starting to think that string cheese may be the greatest (dairy) invention of our time. Worst: Go-gurt. I think if a snack food sounds like a stomach noise, that's a bad thing.
When I grow up, I would like to feed tiny monkeys with baby bottles. What experience should I have on my resume?
The problem with technology is that it makes us think about things and ask questions that people are not made to ask-- deep, ethically complicated questions like: where does the spit sucked at the dentist's office go? Can one water plants with spit? Is it someone's job to empty the spit-sucker? Could one swim in spit? Or is it more viscous than watery? And who decided it was just too much effort to spit?
 
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