I think the more people you are dating, the less you care about each of them.
I wonder if the same applies to how many kids you have.

Gender Studies

Female: I wonder what he expects from me. I already told him no, so maybe if he's still pursuing then he is fine to just hang out.
Male: I mean, women are known to play coy.
Female: You mean, he might think that no means maybe?
Male: "Yes" is an unfamiliar word.

Meeting 27 year old men at bars makes me feel better about being 22.
Their funny dancing helps also.

The thing about being hilarious is that people are often intimidated.

Everything I know about biology I learned from the Magic School Bus. It's an interesting realization that one of my most important teachers was Mrs. Frizzle.

He's a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a whole wheat tortilla, topped with sour cream.

She wouldn't take you back if you begged and pleaded. Heads up though-- she's a sucker for tap dancing and serenades.

The only true way to know that someone is your soul mate is if they pick your cards at Apples to Apples. All the other stuff is just extra.

Sometimes writing blog entries feels productive. Other times, reality hurts.

My hyacinth flower is officially dead.
A moment of silence for Cynthia.
He was a good friend to all.

Turns out I have a deep fear of first dates. Also second ones.

When I look at the kids these days, I often think to myself: "I would never let my daughter wear that." I would want my daughter to at least look like an expensive hooker.

Doesn't everyone want the same things?
Enough to eat, a safe place to sleep, friends and family who care about them, and for everyone who ever went out with them to still be in love with them forever.
Is that so hard?

Advice from an 89 year old woman on how to live a long life:

"Just keep moving."

I'd never ask you to be someone you weren't, except for something that I decided was better.

The thing about bunnies is I want one.
Also guinea pigs.
Also kittens.
Also goats.
Also dogs.
I guess what I'm looking for in a person is a petting zoo.

"Yes, I saw him. He looks miserable. Yea, maybe a little bit fat. He went to the bathroom a few times, probably to cry."

Good friends know to tell you the truth as you want to hear it.

Blowing dandelions into the wind is always special-- unless you're wearing lip gloss.

Really good marshmallow roaster should fit somewhere on a resume.

Some people are very self-centered and think that everything revolves around them. This is obviously not true because it revolves around me and that just doesn't match up with physics (somehow).

When people hurt you, sometimes sorry isn't enough. I guess I really can't forgive and let go until I feel that an apology is true. It may take more than one apology. It may take begging and pleading and convincing. It might even need torn clothing and weeping and iambic pentameter. They're lucky I'm such a forgiving person.

To write a poem
is nicer than just saying
"I still think of you..."

It makes it sound nice
to take form in poetry
rather than, "...you jerk."

People talk a lot
but they don't say much. Haikus
say much more in less.

I need a poem
to turn in for tomorrow.
Facebook ruins me.

I bet not a lot of people drop out of school one month before graduating college. But I bet a lot of people consider it.

Any time I really have to study or do an assignment for class, I feel a strong desire to clean the entire house and bake chocolate chip cookies for everyone who lives on our street. I think it's a sign that I should just drop out of school and become a housewife.

A hint to non-baseball fanatics: if you are going to a game with a baseball fan friend and they keep their own score, you are not going to get to leave until the game is over. Really over, over. Sometimes that means 15 innings. Don't worry, you get to stretch again during the 14th inning.

Finally, Inspirational Poetry

Two Cures for Love
by Wendy Cope

1. Don't see him. Don't phone or write a letter.
2. The easy way: get to know him better.

Karaoke is like childbirth, nobody wants to see you do it and it only makes a mess.

Maybe concussions are the only delete button for involuntary relationship memories.